47 Ronin Review



Shadow’s Rating: 3/10– It is just fucking boring and the supposed pay off never comes.

Shadow’s Initial Viewing Rating: 3/10
Shadow’s Rewatchability Rating: 1/10

Worth: $0

Rotten Tomatoe’s Rating: 12%, 4.1/10
Audience: 50%, 6.4/10


Plot In A Nut Shell: The Good Guys samurai master is betrayed by the Bad Guys, leaving the Good Guys samurai as masterless Ronin. They plot revenge to regain their honor. Plus, there is a white guy in the movie who does weird shit and is kind of a bad ass. I am not sure of his purpose.


Spoiler Free Thoughts…

– This movie is just boring all around. You get the typical slow Asian style build up but done by Americans so it isn’t done as well. Then when you get the big pay off, the big action moment you have been waiting for (47 vs Infinity like the trailer said…), it is so generic and boring it pisses you off and makes you realize you just wasted 2 hours of your life for nothing.

– Seriously, the big action scene pisses me off. This was billed as a kind of 300 but for Samurai. It never feels like that. It never feels like there were insurmountable odds or anything. It feels like 47 vs 47. Seriously. So disappointing.

– I really don’t understand the point of Keanu Reeves character. It seems like his only worth was a plot device once and to add some supernatural stuff to the movie. His whole story seemed stupid as fuck and really… arg lol. I assumed they just needed SOME name to use for this movie because the real lead actor was some Japanese guy who… acted like all movie Japanese guys do lol.

Yeah, not real in-depth with this movie because IT WAS BORING AS FUCK.

Join me after the jump if you really wanna hear some Spoiler Filled thoughts…

– Seriously, what was the deal with the white guy? He was trained/tortured by these demon people, got cool as powers but won’t use them unless he has too? Wut? They get these swords, which I assumed would be special swords to “even the odds” so to speak but nope… this movie is too boring for that. Just fucking swords.

– I will never fully understand ritualistic suicide for honor than samurai movies are obsessed with. I guess it is just not my culture *shrugs*

– The ending big battle was so disappointing. All this talk about how huge the army is and this and that and it never felt that way. It never felt like the odds were insurmountable but they just HAD to do it for their honor. It was just… meh. All the action scenes were meh and their wasn’t a good enough plot or interesting enough characters to make up for it. Not. Even. Close.



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